Crushes

Crushes.
You say that’s all I’ve got is
Crushes.
Little thumb to pinkie doodles across my palm
While you paint canvases just to watch them burn.
But these crushes
These crushes that you spit out like bitter seeds to your past
Are all I’ve been allowed to feel.
All I’ve been given permission to feel.
My fingers know the curve of a paint brush
And my hearts been begging for a canvas
But I’ve never been allowed one.
So don't pity me for my crushes.
Do not look down because that’s all I have.
These crushes have taught me more about love
Than the ashes of a thousand canvases have taught you.
I know how to give of myself completely.
I know how to heal a heart.
I know where to run when it crumbles.
I know how to let go.
So don't pity me for my crushes.
Don't feel bad for my limitations
Because I know who I am
And that more important than who could've been.