Not Tonight

I wish you cared enough to realize I’m falling apart.

I wish you weren’t so philosophical that you thought people were meant to sort things out alone.

Some things you are.

I grant you that.

But sometimes you just need to know there is a hand in the dark.

Someone in the stands cheering you on.

Someone beyond this moment who will be there.

But you’re not that person.

You never have been and you never will be.

Whenever I place my problems at your feet I can hear the awkwardness in your voice.

So tonight I won’t approach you with my problems.

I will take the deep breaths you’d tell me to take.

I’ll look up at this old moon and hold on for tomorrow.

Because you don’t care enough to realize I’m falling apart.

But I’m strong enough to keep myself together.