What's going on here?

What's going on here?
Well Amanda and Emily both have goals to write more. Amanda wants to write a poem and a half a day for the next year, while Emily wants to write for National Write a Novel Month (NaNoWriMo), which is usually in November, but she is going to do it from now until her mission on May 18th. Here is were you can follow us in our goals! Leave comments, encouragement, and what ever else you feel like.

Wednesday, May 25, 2011

You're Pretty in Pink

I was ashamed.

Ashamed of the way I felt for you.

Part of it was because I was taught

Emotions make you weak.

If people know how you really feel

They can hurt you.

But it was also because,,,

I knew it was dumb.

Dumb for me to have such deep controlling feelings about you.

About someone who never let anyone past the surface.

It was dumb to feel a connection with someone

Who spent their whole life aloof.

It was like I was back in 7th grade.

Crushing hard on the star basketball player while I spent all my time in the band room.

I knew it was stupid to feel for you like I did.

But I guess I’ve just watched too many 80’s movies.

I am not Andy,

I am not the girl from 16 candles,

I am not any of Molly Ringwald’s characters.

Instead I am Ducky.

I am the one who spends years trying to work up the courage

And just watched you walk away.

But that’s okay

Because I knew it was dumb from the start.

Dumb for feeling the way I did.

It’s like some form of hubris.

My fatal flaw.

Always falling for the emotionally unavailable.

But that’s okay now.

I can say your name out loud now.

I can admit something now.

But you still won’t hear it.

You never heard it.

Andy never understood what she did to Ducky

When she walked away.

But I do.

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